Hi I'm Brad Jackson. The full blog you're reading is below, but I created PUMA Skills to teach guys how to use pick up artist magic tricks to break the ice with girls.To discover more about PUMA Skills, Magic and how to end world hunger (well, maybe the first two only)...
I’m not an asian guy. WOW. Surprise.
So it’s hard for me to give advice to Asian met about how to increase their dating success and get over the mindset that they’re somehow at a disadvantage. Whether that’s true or not, I have had a chance to make friends with a really insightful expert in this exact field. His name is Ryker Koh and he’s the author of “Asian Dating Superstars”
I interviewed Ryker and am making the Audio and a transcript (partial) available for you here. This will be useful no matter what race you are.
Check it out.
(If Ryker’s voice is a bit muffled I’m sorry)
I asked Ryker how Asian guys can overcome disappointment and be more confident with women and in bed and overcome a lot of the limiting beliefs and mental obstacles Asian guys face that prevents them from having successful in dating and enjoying a great sex life
Here’s just a short snippet of our 40min interview. You can listen to the full audio above.
BRAD: Now Ryker, is it much harder for Asian guys in Westernized cultures like the United States or Europe for instance in dating like white girls? Are they finding a lot more challenges than the Asian guys in Asian countries?
And sometimes when you are in a different, you have that limiting belief that you’re already the disadvantaged. The question being, how easy or how hard is it to overcome those limiting beliefs and how much of it is true versus how much of it is the way you carry yourself, the things you say and everything else?
RYKER: I think that’s an excellent question and I think it’s one of those things comes back to a self-fulfilling prophecy. So when I spoke to a lot of coaches on the call, they could identify a lot with, a lot of issues and questions you just mentioned and I think it all comes down to this…
If you believe flat out before you even approach that girls might find you unattractive, you’re going to behave subconsciously in your body language, in your tonality, in your actions and your choice of words, the unattractive mannerisms because you believe you’re unattractive. It’s as simple as that.
BRAD: Well, letting go of limiting beliefs and all and now you’re confident that you can do it or that these guys can do it, what do you think is some of the biggest keys to their success that you’ve seen beyond just believing that they can attract any woman that they want?
RYKER: I think an absolutely brilliant question. I’m just going all listeners here about five to six tips that really work and this five to six tips are actually, the coaches and I go really in-depth in the product but whether you’re Asian or not, this five to six tips really, really apply.
The first thing is to—is that thinking is overrated. That’s the first tip. Thinking is overrated. A lot of guys in a community, they kind of get worked up on this whole issue of inner game. “Oh, should I believe that women, that I’m attractive to women?”
You know what, most of the coaches on the calls say, they hardly think in field. When they’re out there, they just do stuff, which means the most important thing therefore is firstly do before you think because whatever you think is actually overrated.
Number two, one of the things that a lot of coaches mentioned is in fact, there are times when even talking is overrated. Talking is overrated.
In fact, there are a lot of Asian guys out there who get very worried with their accent. They get actually worried with their accent. They get worried that, you know, they may not pronounce words properly. The strange thing is, a lot of cultures that I interviewed actually had the same problems at the start, but one of the coaches that I interviewed mentioned that he kind of went out one day and he hardly even said a word.
In fact, he did not say more than a hundred or 200 words to a girl. Just by pure body language and pure confidence, he managed to get her home and slept with her.
So, even if you are worried that you have a bad accent, you know, the way you pronounce words may not be that attractive, just understand that body language and projecting you self-confidence and self-look in yourself is more important than actually speaking.
In fact, a lot of guys get out there with so much material that they pay too much attention to their material instead of to the girl, which is a criminal sin. Now the third—
BRAD: That’s a great point, by the way.
RYKER: Yeah, so the most important thing is actually just go out there and project your confidence and just be comfortable in the entire direction.
The third thing that a lot of coaches mentioned is this, is that your peer group is the most important thing.
Now, this is a quote I heard Anthony Robbins? and he said “Proximity is power.”
So if you’re spending a lot of time with a lot of guys who you grew up with that are actually caring friends but have a lot of disempowering beliefs, you are better off leaving the peer group and finding people who are on the same path as you.
Because even though these friends care for you, these disempowering beliefs will slowly infect you and they are the things that hold you back. For example, if you hang out with Asian friends who all sit together and commiserate about how poor being Asian is, guess what, you will not think that being Asian is powerful of is empowering.
But if you hang out with like some of the people on my product and you just kind of see their success on a periodical basis, you think to yourself, “Oh my God, this can be done. Being Asian is not a problem.”
BRAD: No. It can be an advantage too.
RYKER: Yes, it can be an advantage. Absolutely. So, because you’re kind of different, you’re exotic and the whole Asian culture really actually, in reversed terms, a lot goes on.
The fourth thing that I want to give to all the listeners here is that doing it is more important than reading it. In fact, read everything with the mindset of doing it. I think a lot of guys are guilty of reading information products for amusement.
BRAD: Yeah.
RYKER: And this means they pick a book and they say, “Oh, this is so great.” And I think that David Wygant calls that mental masturbation, I think it’s in one of his recent blog posts.
BRAD: I agree.
RYKER: They just read it and think it’s so good. “Oh, this feels awesome,” and then you stay home and do nothing.
BRAD: Mm-hmm.
RYKER: Whereas if you’re to read a book like a gold digger, a person who’s out there, out to dig out the best nuggets and then, so that you can go out there and use it immediately, you read it in a completely different frame of light.
Read every single material you have as if it was a lifesaving manual and you’re about to use it one day or 1 hour from now.
BRAD: Yeah.
RYKER: So don’t just read it and feel good. Read it so that you can imagine yourself, “Okay, what am I going to do? What am I going to say? How is this going to affect me?” Pick out the nuggets and straightaway implement it.
And the last tip that I want to give guys is that all learning has to be done in field.
You have to actually do it. You have to actually do it and there are a lot of subtle differences and subtle things you pick up when you do it for real than when you’re just reading it.
For example, when you’re doing it for real, you kind of notice that you know, you kind of your emotional changes. You kind of notice things are not always the same as when you read it, but when you just read it, you have a lot limiting beliefs and you hit like, “Oh, is this real? Can I do this?”.
You know what? Shut up and go do it, because nothing is a substitute for real life in few actions. So those are the kind of top five tips I like to give to everyone who’s listening.
To get the rest of the interview, just click the play button up top.
And if you found that useful, Ryker reveals even more tips in the full, entire interview including … how Asian guys can overcome negative programming that have been drilled into their heads since birth, break out of the weak “Asian” male stereotype and eliminate other Asian-specific insecurities to become a sexually confident and attractive Asian man that naturally attracts women.
Visit Asian Dating Superstars here to find out more. Asian Dating Superstars
